Last Saturday, I attended a mama event curated by Mamahoodzw, and it all started the way most things life do these days, Instagram.

It’s funny how your algorithm evolves as you evolve. One day your feed is outfits, brunch spots and soft life. The next, it’s breastfeeding tips, baby milestones and reels about teething.

So when I saw the post about a celebratory walk for moms, I thought, cute, wholesome, low-effort movement. A nice stroll, some fresh air, a few conversations. Perfect.

Well, the walk I signed up for turned into a bootcamp session courtesy of Sweatnation. The “walk” quickly turned into squats, lousy push ups, and movements that made me question my life choices. According to Barbs, the instructor, that was beginner level…hooo nhai?! That wasn’t a train smash though, I am a strong girl and it actually ended up being the best thing to happen that morning.

Just when I thought my legs couldn’t file for divorce from the rest of my body, we moved on to a dance session led by Chenge, my newest addiction I must say because I have 2 dance classes with her this weekend. Now, in theory, dancing is fun. In practice? I discovered that my body and rhythm are not on speaking terms.

Miss Little Two Left Feet here was out of sync, off-beat and occasionally facing the wrong direction. But Chenge? She was so sweet and effortlessly cool at what she does. The kind of instructor who makes you want to keep trying even when you look like you’re buffering in real life.

After all the sweating, laughing and pretending we weren’t out of breath, we eventually sat down. We played a few games, caught our breath, and then the conversation shifted into something deeper, motherhood.

The discussion was anchored on one simple question:
“What is one thing that sometimes makes it hard to fully enjoy the joys of motherhood?”

Now, before we go any further, let me just say this, I’m not here to join the current wave of content that paints motherhood as some sort of lifelong punishment or a trap. Wena Felicia you’re stuck in toxic job. Nothing in life is 100% blissful all the time; not careers, not relationships, not even vacations but asikho lapho.

The conversation among us mamas was honest. We spoke about how friendships shift when one person becomes a mom and the other doesn’t. How sometimes you have to extend grace in both directions.

We touched on the idea of “the village” that mythical support system everyone talks about but not everyone actually has. And in passing, we shared moments of resentment and adjustment that can come with big life transitions. I remember back when I had just given birth not living with the guy I share my home Wi-Fi with. Watching him still go out, live his normal life, while I was home navigating this huge physical and emotional change. Because what do you mean we not downing Zambezi together? At the time, it felt unfair. These days, I see it differently, and it was part of the journey.

What stood out most to me, though, was how easy it was to talk in that circle. No over-explaining. No awkward pauses. Just girlies who got it.

There’s something incredibly comforting about having mama friends, people you can complain to without feeling like you’re being dramatic, people who won’t hit you with “but motherhood is a blessing” every time you express that you’re tired. Of course it’s a blessing. It’s also exhausting, hilarious, messy and beautiful and sometimes all in the same hour.

It made me realise that motherhood, like every other phase of life, is easier when you have people who relate. You can’t expect someone who’s never had a child to fully grasp what it means to be responsible for another human 24/7.

That walk-that-ended-up-not-being-a-walk reminded me of two things and that is first, I am ready for war because the things I did during that bootcamp? I shall not speak. Second, community makes this whole motherhood thing feel lighter.

And honestly? I’ll take sore legs and off-beat dancing any day if it means gaining a circle of women who remind me that I’m not navigating this season alone.

Shoutout to mamahood for that big hug of a morning, looking forward to next year’s edition.

Love & light 🧡